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I've been listening to this song NONSTOP. It's called "The Wonderful Future" by Our Lady Peace (Jordy is mentioned here for being the reason I'm into 'em) and is amazing. I discovered it existed about a week ago, and have listened to it dozens of times since. I listen to it a few times in a row before I sleep, throughout the day, several times in a row whenever I get in my car. I talk about it in blogs on the internet.

Also: I'm pretty much done with this semester at school. Summer's here, and now I can't even retain the excuse that my unemployment is related to school's workload. My life's been feeling incredibly monotonous lately. I'm frustrated with myself, my environment, and my belongings, and my acquaintances. Actually, this is the second time I'm typing up this blog update. The first time was erased when my laptop decided to shut itself off, as it's grown accustomed to not asking my permission to do so.

Basically: I need to get laid, and it's turning me into a cynical and cranky douche, which I don't like. But fucking random sluts is fail, and the decent women in my life seem to only come in few varieties:
- Sorry, I am in a relationship.
- Hey we're great friends and have been for a while.
- What's your roommate up to?
- False alarm, I'm a bitch.

What's this mean to you people? Nothing. In related news (related to me and my life, that is. Which is why you're here. To read about my life. Oh you're not? Well fuck off and die, plzkthx (jk, stay and respond so that I might be entertained by your comment)): I'll be lurking around the forums a lot more than I did previously. A LOT MORE. 100% lurk-to-post ratio for the next several months. Why? Because I feel like it. I'll still be here, just kinda backseating my participation.

This summer's plans include:
- Fitness
- Fun
- Frugality

... that's all I feel like writing. Maybe I'll update this later to include a poem for your perusal. Even though I know most of you will either ignore it, not get it, or post an old joke in a psuedo-facetious manner that's been done to death relating to it. See? That cynicism just creeps right in.

________
| UPDATE |

Here's a poem for you guys to ignore/critique/whatever. I really like it.

A dialogue between an individual and his environment

Modern convenience of pen and paper,
Though apt to attract many an aper,
So allowing an insight inside-out
And leaving the context mostly to doubt;
Yet hoping to instill context in you,
The reader who otherwise would eschew
A perfect description's perfect setting

Of a twelve by ten, frustrating homestead
Over bright green hill, trees, and brick buildings instead--
Of a slowly wafting coffee's ascent
Toward the morning nostrils' cognizant scent--
Of an inquisitive bee at the screen
Trying to get in, and as it is seen
Persuading my exit. Most convincing.

Updated: 05/20/08 3:59 PM Log in to comment! | Share this!

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21 Comments

May. 15, 2008 | 4:54 PM Usernamed says:

FUCK YOU BITCH

May. 15, 2008 | 4:56 PM Evark responds:

Surely surly's uncalled for.

May. 15, 2008 | 4:59 PM SaltshakerClock says:

I will indeed read that all but first I must ask;

What part of MA is Gloucester? North, South, East, West, South-east, etc.

May. 15, 2008 | 5:10 PM Evark responds:

It's the eastern-most city north of boston. As Google Maps tells you every time you so inquire.

May. 15, 2008 | 5:11 PM SaltshakerClock says:

Ah.

I might have to visit you sometime then.

But it seems like a long ride. D:

May. 15, 2008 | 5:33 PM Evark responds:

Where're your where-abouts? I'd be willing to buy you a drink if you're of legal age. But I don't actually want to plan or commit to anything except a "yea we should do that sometime" sorta deal at this point.

May. 15, 2008 | 8:03 PM NoPurchaseNecessary says:

You should move down south. There's an surplus of awesome girls here, srsly.

May. 15, 2008 | 9:03 PM Evark responds:

The surplus should move up north then, damnit.

May. 16, 2008 | 2:36 AM JackPhantasm says:

Whatsup nm.

how do I emb videos.

i posted the link in the emb thing and it didn't work :(

May. 16, 2008 | 1:00 PM Evark responds:

You don't need the link, you need the "embed this video" code just to the right of the movie you're watching on youtube. I don't know where it's located for other sites, I hadn't even heard of the other places NG says it supports for embedding.

May. 16, 2008 | 4:56 AM NoPurchaseNecessary says:

Biotch, it is too goddamn cold up there.

May. 16, 2008 | 2:05 PM Evark responds:

I'll get coffee. Though it's soon summer, it's beautiful up here this time of year.

... clearly you drink coffee, based on the 5AM post time of your comment.

May. 16, 2008 | 2:16 PM SaltshakerClock says:

MY whereabouts are south of Boston, but I probably won't meet soon.

It's quite suspicious for a kid to be walking around screaming, "EVARK, WHERE ARE YOU EVARK?"

May. 16, 2008 | 2:59 PM Evark responds:

Ha ha. Yea, you'd have a hard time finding me that way. : b Unless you ran into someone who personally knew me, because then 'Evark' would actually ring a bell with them.

May. 16, 2008 | 2:34 PM Mechabloby says:

you have gay hair.

just kidding, afros are fucking ace

May. 16, 2008 | 3:00 PM Evark responds:

I miss it. My hair hasn't been that way for nearly 6 months now. Thinking of shaving myself bald this summer. : o

May. 16, 2008 | 3:16 PM TropicalParadise says:

I know how you feel. I'm feeling really useless now. I don't want to work in a shitty office wasting my summer only for money. I want to do something fun. How is the running on the beach coming? Any hopes of mine have been unfulfilled as laziness takes over. blegh.

May. 16, 2008 | 6:21 PM Evark responds:

Unstarted. I haven't quite moved back home yet.

May. 17, 2008 | 1:00 PM EyeLovePoozy says:

Cynicism is a bitch man. I do agree that a steady supply of pussy would alleviate that situation. But since your bar is set so high you're fucked. I suggest lowering your standards. Just like the military does whenever we desperately need more soldiers. Except in this case you desperately need to release more soldiers. XD
Preferably between some bitches beef curtains because if jacking off were a viable alternative. Your situation would be much improved or non existant.
I'm sure

Awesome song btw.

May. 17, 2008 | 3:37 PM Evark responds:

I can't lower the bar. Lemme put it like this: it's like limbo. There're two pegs, and then there's the bar. My peg is pretty much permanently set, so adjusting the other peg would make the bar itself unstable and likely to fall off. Sure, it can take small deviations from the level, but not too far in either direction.

But yea. Glad you like the song.

May. 18, 2008 | 8:36 PM Malachy says:

all your poetry are belong to us

May. 18, 2008 | 10:26 PM Evark responds:

Someone set up us the rhyme.

May. 18, 2008 | 10:35 PM TropicalParadise says:

You could fuck ONE slut, just to get it out of your system, and then when you're feeling good, set your standards up higher.

And then blame it on beer.

May. 18, 2008 | 11:47 PM Evark responds:

It's an idea, for sure.

May. 19, 2008 | 11:30 PM UberBarista says:

MEAT!

May. 20, 2008 | 10:18 AM Evark responds:

You said it.

May. 21, 2008 | 12:58 PM NotarealAccount says:

I AM TOO REAL. FAGGOT

May. 22, 2008 | 11:10 PM SevenSeize says:

Here are my plans for the summer.
1. drinking
2. sleeping

Rinse and repeat.

May. 24, 2008 | 2:53 AM Evark responds:

Partyyy!

I just recently tried this Belgian beer Hoegaardin(sp?). Brewed with a hint of coriander and orange peels. Took getting used to, but by the end of the twelve pack I'd grown to enjoy it. Recommended.

May. 27, 2008 | 4:28 AM BALLLSSSSSS says:

YOU SUCK MY DICK BITCH ASS MOTHER FUCKER ASS WIPE N****R . GO SUCK MY DICK AND DIE BITCH ASS FUCKING WHORE MOFO BITCH ASS THE FUCK YOU N****R BITCH I'LL RAPE YOUR SUPER AWSOME ASSHOLE FOR FREE WITH 60% OFF IF YOU SUCK MY DICK ON THE EMPIOROR STATE BIULDING . FINDERS FEE BITCH. I LIKE FOOTBALLS BECUSE THEY TASTE LIKE WOOD. I LIKE CANDYAND KNOCK KNOCK JOKES AND LOL . MY DICK IS EXTRA 12 FOOTER BECASUE I TOOK VIAGRA BECAUSE I HEARD IT TASTE GOOD. MY NAME IS BALLLSSSSSS AND THIS IS MY WILL: BALLLSSSSSS IS AWSOME BECAUSE ITS HOT AND JUICE SO IM GOING TO TAKE OFF MY SHIRT AND IF YOU ARE READING THIS, LOLOLOLOL YOUR GAYGAYGAYGAY. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG THIS MOD SUCKS DONKEY BALLS AND DESERVES TO DIE BECUASE I ACTUALLY THINK HE'S GAY BECAUSE HE TALKS LIKE A FAG ALL TEH TIME WHEN I TALK TO HIM ON HIS PAGE THINGING LOLOLOLOL YOU THINK THIS IS MY REAL ACCOUNT? LOL THINK AGAIN. AND YOU WONT FIND THE REAL ACCOUNT EITHER.HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA OMGOMG IM SO HUNGRY FOR COCK. IM ALSO HORNY FOR DONUTS BECASEU THEIR HOLE MAKES AN EXCELLENT VAGINA LOLOLLO. SUCK MY HUGE ENORMUOS GIGANTIC COCK PLEASE BECAUSE ITS TASTY AND SWEATY AND RED. I HAVE TWO RED PENISES LOLOLOLOL OMGO OMG OMG OMG NEWGROUNDS SUCKS BALLS. DON'T FORGET TO WATCH MY NEW MOVIE COMING OUT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO DO WITHA GUY KILLING ANOTHER GUY THEN RUNNING FROM THE ONE GUY AND GOING CRAZY AND KILLING HIMSELF. THEN I'LL MAKE A SEQUAL TO THAT MOVIE BECAUSE I THINK IT WILL BE A HUGER SUCSESS. OMG OMG IT'S 4 OCLOCK IN THE MORNING WHEN I AM WRITING THIS OMG LOL I'M BANNED FOSURE I BET BECAUSE THIS FAG ASS MOD CAN'T TAKE A JOKE AND DOESNT THINK TO DELETE THESE MESSAGES OMGOMGOMG. I HOPE I DIE OF BALL CANCER BECASUE I HEARD IT IS THE BEST WAY TO DIE BECASUE I LOVE BALLS AND CANDY AND LOL AGAIN :d :3 OMG MOD I AM WRITING TO: I LOVE YOU :3 BECASUE I IS GET AND DESERVE TO HAVE A SMALL DICK . YOU SUCK MY DICK BITCH ASS MOTHER FUCKER ASS WIPE N****R . GO SUCK MY DICK AND DIE BITCH ASS FUCKING WHORE MOFO BITCH ASS THE FUCK YOU N****R BITCH I'LL RAPE YOUR SUPER AWSOME ASSHOLE FOR FREE WITH 60% OFF IF YOU SUCK MY DICK ON THE EMPIOROR STATE BIULDING . FINDERS FEE BITCH. I LIKE FOOTBALLS BECUSE THEY TASTE LIKE WOOD. I LIKE CANDYAND KNOCK KNOCK JOKES AND LOL . MY DICK IS EXTRA 12 FOOTER BECASUE I TOOK VIAGRA BECAUSE I HEARD IT TASTE GOOD. MY NAME IS BALLLSSSSSS AND THIS IS MY WILL: BALLLSSSSSS IS AWSOME BECAUSE ITS HOT AND JUICE SO IM GOING TO TAKE OFF MY SHIRT AND IF YOU ARE READING THIS, LOLOLOLOL YOUR GAYGAYGAYGAY. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG THIS MOD SUCKS DONKEY BALLS AND DESERVES TO DIE BECUASE I ACTUALLY THINK HE'S GAY BECAUSE HE TALKS LIKE A FAG ALL TEH TIME WHEN I TALK TO HIM ON HIS PAGE THINGING LOLOLOLOL YOU THINK THIS IS MY REAL ACCOUNT? LOL THINK AGAIN. AND YOU WONT FIND THE REAL ACCOUNT EITHER.HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA OMGOMG IM SO HUNGRY FOR COCK. IM ALSO HORNY FOR DONUTS BECASEU THEIR HOLE MAKES AN EXCELLENT VAGINA LOLOLLO. SUCK MY HUGE ENORMUOS GIGANTIC COCK PLEASE BECAUSE ITS TASTY AND SWEATY AND RED. I HAVE TWO RED PENISES LOLOLOLOL OMGO OMG OMG OMG NEWGROUNDS SUCKS BALLS. DON'T FORGET TO WATCH MY NEW MOVIE COMING OUT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO DO WITHA GUY KILLING ANOTHER GUY THEN RUNNING FROM THE ONE GUY AND GOING CRAZY AND KILLING HIMSELF. THEN I'LL MAKE A SEQUAL TO THAT MOVIE BECAUSE I THINK IT WILL BE A HUGER SUCSESS. OMG OMG IT'S 4 OCLOCK IN THE MORNING WHEN I AM WRITING THIS OMG LOL I'M BANNED FOSURE I BET BECAUSE THIS FAG ASS MOD CAN'T TAKE A JOKE AND DOESNT THINK TO DELETE THESE MESSAGES OMGOMGOMG. I HOPE I DIE OF BALL CANCER BECASUE I HEARD IT IS THE BEST WAY TO DIE BECASUE I LOVE BALLS AND CANDY AND LOL AGAIN :d :3 OMG MOD I AM WRITING TO: I LOVE YOU :3 BECASUE I IS GET AND DESERVE TO HAVE A SMALL DICK . YOU SUCK MY DICK BITCH ASS MOTHER FUCKER ASS WIPE N****R . GO SUCK MY DICK AND DIE BITCH ASS FUCKING WHORE MOFO BITCH ASS THE FUCK YOU N****R BITCH I'LL RAPE YOUR SUPER AWSOME ASSHOLE FOR FREE WITH 60% OFF IF YOU SUCK MY DICK ON THE EMPIOROR STATE BIULDING . FINDERS FEE BITCH. I LIKE FOOTBALLS BECUSE THEY TASTE LIKE WOOD. I LIKE CANDYAND KNOCK KNOCK JOKES AND LOL . MY DICK IS EXTRA 12 FOOTER BECASUE I TOOK VIAGRA BECAUSE I HEARD IT TASTE GOOD. MY NAME IS BALLLSSSSSS AND THIS IS MY WILL: BALLLSSSSSS IS AWSOME BECAUSE ITS HOT AND JUICE SO IM GOING TO TAKE OFF MY SHIRT AND IF YOU ARE READING THIS, LOLOLOLOL YOUR GAYGAYGAYGAY. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG THIS MOD SUCKS DONKEY BALLS AND DESERVES TO DIE BECUASE I ACTUALLY THINK HE'S GAY BECAUSE HE TALKS LIKE A FAG ALL TEH TIME WHEN I TALK TO HIM ON HIS PAGE THINGING LOLOLOLOL YOU THINK THIS IS MY REAL ACCOUNT? LOL THINK AGAIN. AND YOU WONT FIND THE REAL ACCOUNT EITHER.HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA OMGOMG IM SO HUNGRY FOR COCK. IM ALSO HORNY FOR DONUTS BECASEU THEIR HOLE MAKES AN EXCELLENT VAGINA LOLOLLO. SUCK MY HUGE ENORMUOS GIGANTIC COCK PLEASE BECAUSE ITS TASTY AND SWEATY AND RED. I HAVE TWO RED PENISES LOLOLOLOL OMGO OMG OMG OMG NEWGROUNDS SUCKS BALLS. DON'T FORGET TO WATCH MY NEW MOVIE COMING OUT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO DO WITHA GUY KILLING ANOTHER GUY THEN RUNNING FROM THE ONE GUY AND GOING CRAZY AND KILLING HIMSELF. THEN I'LL MAKE A SEQUAL TO THAT MOVIE BECAUSE I THINK IT WILL BE A HUGER SUCSESS. OMG OMG IT'S 4 OCLOCK IN THE MORNING WHEN I AM WRITING THIS OMG LOL I'M BANNED FOSURE I BET BECAUSE THIS FAG ASS MOD CAN'T TAKE A JOKE AND DOESNT THINK TO DELETE THESE MESSAGES OMGOMGOMG. I HOPE I DIE OF BALL CANCER BECASUE I HEARD IT IS THE BEST WAY TO DIE BECASUE I LOVE BALLS AND CANDY AND LOL AGAIN :d :3 OMG MOD I AM WRITING TO: I LOVE YOU :3 BECASUE I IS GET AND DESERVE TO HAVE A SMALL DICK . YOU SUCK MY DICK BITCH ASS MOTHER FUCKER ASS WIPE N****R . GO SUCK MY DICK AND DIE BITCH ASS FUCKING WHORE MOFO BITCH ASS THE FUCK YOU N****R BITCH I'LL RAPE YOUR SUPER AWSOME ASSHOLE FOR FREE WITH 60% OFF IF YOU SUCK MY DICK ON THE EMPIOROR STATE BIULDING . FINDERS FEE BITCH. I LIKE FOOTBALLS BECUSE THEY TASTE LIKE WOOD. I LIKE CANDYAND KNOCK KNOCK JOKES AND LOL . MY DICK IS EXTRA 12 FOOTER BECASUE I TOOK VIAGRA BECAUSE I HEARD IT TASTE GOOD. MY NAME IS BALLLSSSSSS AND THIS IS MY WILL: BALLLSSSSSS IS AWSOME BECAUSE ITS HOT AND JUICE SO IM GOING TO TAKE OFF MY SHIRT AND IF YOU ARE READING THIS, LOLOLOLOL YOUR GAYGAYGAYGAY. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG THIS MOD SUCKS DONKEY BALLS AND DESERVES TO DIE BECUASE I ACTUALLY THINK HE'S GAY BECAUSE HE TALKS LIKE A FAG ALL TEH TIME WHEN I TALK TO HIM ON HIS PAGE THINGING LOLOLOLOL YOU THINK THIS IS MY REAL ACCOUNT? LOL THINK AGAIN. AND YOU WONT FIND THE REAL ACCOUNT EITHER.HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA OMGOMG IM SO HUNGRY FOR COCK. IM ALSO HORNY FOR DONUTS BECASEU THEIR HOLE MAKES AN EXCELLENT VAGINA LOLOLLO. SUCK MY HUGE ENORMUOS GIGANTIC COCK PLEASE BECAUSE ITS TASTY AND SWEATY AND RED. I HAVE TWO RED PENISES LOLOLOLOL OMGO OMG OMG OMG NEWGROUNDS SUCKS BALLS. DON'T FORGET TO WATCH MY NEW MOVIE COMING OUT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO DO WITHA GUY KILLING ANOTHER GUY THEN RUNNING FROM THE ONE GUY AND GOING CRAZY AND KILLING HIMSELF. THEN I'LL MAKE A SEQUAL TO THAT MOVIE BECAUSE I THINK IT WILL BE A HUGER SUCSESS. OMG OMG IT'S 4 OCLOCK IN THE MORNING WHEN I AM WRITING THIS OMG LOL I'M BANNED FOSURE I BET BECAUSE THIS FAG ASS MOD CAN'T TAKE A JOKE AND DOESNT THINK TO DELETE THESE MESSAGES OMGOMGOMG. I HOPE I DIE OF BALL CANCER BECASUE I HEARD IT IS THE BEST WAY TO DIE BECASUE I LOVE BALLS AND CANDY AND LOL AGAIN :d :3 OMG MOD I AM WRITING TO: I LOVE YOU :3 BECASUE I IS GET AND DESERVE TO HAVE A SMALL DICK . fuck bitch ass OMGOMGOMGOMG THIS MOD SUCKS DONKEY BALLS AND DESERVES TO DIE BECUASE I ACTUALLY THINK HE'S GAY BECAUSE HE TALKS LIKE A FAG ALL TEH TIME WHEN I TALK TO HIM ON HIS PAGE THINGING LOLOLOLOL YOU THINK THIS IS MY REAL ACCOUNT? LOL THINK AGAIN. AND YOU WONT FIND THE REAL ACCOUNT EITHER.HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA OMGOMG IM SO HUNGRY FOR COCK. IM ALSO HORNY FOR DONUTS BECASEU THEIR HOLE MAKES AN EXCELLENT VAGINA LOLOLLO. SUCK MY HUGE ENORMUOS GIGANTIC COCK PLEASE BECAUSE ITS TASTY AND SWEATY AND RED. I HAVE TWO RED PENISES LOLOLOLOL OMGO OMG OMG OMG NEWGROUNDS SUCKS BALLS. DON'T FORGET TO WATCH MY NEW MOVIE COMING OUT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO DO WITHA GUY KILLING ANOTHER GUY THEN RUNNING FROM THE ONE GUY AND GOING CRAZY AND KILLING HIMSELF.done ;

May. 27, 2008 | 3:01 PM Evark responds:

You've made my day.

May. 28, 2008 | 8:10 PM gumOnShoe says:

Ha, I'm the loser who has a monotonous job, but hey I've got money right? Well, having money means that I will be coming out to MA in about a month for various reasons. Specifically the Boston area. I probably won't be able to get in touch, but I'll be around for a few days, specifically the Brandeis area.

Good luck with the girls. I'm going to have the opposite parallel of your situation, where I'm in a relationship but I never see my significant other, or rarely anyway. You need to just mix it up I guess, meet someone new or throw a wrench in one of your friendships.

As for the song, Jordy has the habbit of suggesting something that's going to swing around the old cobwebs for days at a time, or months.

Finally, intersting poem. I liked the bee bit.

May. 28, 2008 | 8:31 PM Evark responds:

Monotonous jobs are win. I want something easy, repetitive, and not at all involving mopping or sweeping floors every night.

Dude... if you're gonna be in the Boston area you HAVE to lemme know. Cell's on facebook, I deposit here daily so I'll get a PM if you send it, etc. Muy'd be willing to meet you as well, I'm sure. My parents are commuters who work in the Boston area, so it's not even a big deal for me to get there on any weekday, and weekends aren't difficult either.

Yea, I used to have the opposite of my situation as well. Was also previously locked in a long-term long-distance relationship.

Glad you liked the poem. I was proud of it, wanted to try an evenly divided sonnet of sorts, since I don't really see 'em that often. Since you may not've noticed, I'll also point out that the final lines in each stanza rhyme and combine.

May. 28, 2008 | 9:42 PM gumOnShoe says:

We'll see about my trip. I'll be recooping one day, setting up an apartment the next for my gf, and then i'll likely be visiting her grandparents to be on a boat or something. Might be a chance on a monday before my flight home, but I dunno. Its gonna be a hectic and rather emotional weekend as its the "i'll see you in a month" weekend for us.

I'm sure we'll want to get out at somepoint though, so I'll try to keep it in mind.

May. 30, 2008 | 7:27 PM Evark responds:

Got it.

Jun. 4, 2008 | 12:50 PM FUCK-OFF says:

My ban is finishing and I make dildos.

Jun. 4, 2008 | 2:50 PM Evark responds:

You should post this in your own blog. Y'know, where there's a chance somebody cares.

Jun. 12, 2008 | 3:45 PM EyeLovePoozy says:

Sans 'fro Red Sox fan
A mod that bans locks deletes
His name is Evark

Jun. 13, 2008 | 11:28 AM PinballWizard976 says:

You look a lot like Seth Rogan

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